The deadly sting of the Russia-Ukraine war has touched my family. My first cousin, dear brother, with whom we grew up in the same jampacked soviet appartment, survived the terrible 90’s and navigated our adolescence years until I left to work abroad, was sent to his first assignment at the end of 2024. Lost on the battlefield soon after. 1,5 years of silence and waiting followed. Was he in captivity or … we did not know. Finally, this week my family will be given a chance to say goodbye. He fell as a hero. We hold the line.
Because of this war, I came to an understanding of many things about life. We are all on the battlefield. But many of us do not know it.
Following the development of the war, with a larger, better-equipped enemy against a country that did not have an army at the beginning, I have realized that the force that kept Ukraine standing was the quality of its people on the front lines.
The Ukrainian army was filled with volunteers who had never pursued a military career. They came from different professional and educational backgrounds. I remember seeing professors giving lectures from the trenches in body armour. I remember listening to the leadership of the Azov brigade of the Ukrainian army with my mouth open, understanding that I was listening to highly educated people. It broke my belief that the army had been sort of “thoughtless”, as the old soviet anecdotes presented.
This gave me strong evidence that what General Mattis said was true.
For the younger officers who might view this lecture, I can tell them how they can become four-star generals. They can fight enemies who are dumber than a bucket full of rocks. And those are generally enemies who have not had the same rigor in pressing themselves to learn from history and to be curious about the world around them.
General James Mattis (An nterview to UCTV and Harry Kreisler) 2014
I wrote earlier that we are all on the battlefield, but many of us are sleeping on this idea. The reality is, there is a war between the good and the evil, tyranny and democracy, slavery and freedom, righteousness and love of sin. This war has casualties. As Hosea said, people perish for the lack of knowledge. To be more precise, the quotation sounds like this according to KJV:
My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge: because thou hast rejected knowledge, I will also reject thee, that thou shalt be no priest to me: seeing thou hast forgotten the law of thy God, I will also forget thy children.
Bible – King James Version (The book of Hosea 4:6)
The law Hosea refers to is not only religious texts, but curiosity about the world around and history. If people reject the knowledge, they become the enemy who is dumber than a bucket full of rocks. The person who treats self-education seriously is set to win in the battle. I believe that this is the reason Ukraine stands.
The tragedy of my brother’s loss is that the two months of instruction before the most deadly battle robbed him of a chance to come back, like most of his compatriots in that assignment. This is the most painful fact for me. The trenches take the lives of experienced and prepared soldiers too. But the number of lost lives of newly employed combatants is in much bigger proportion, I assume. History will show.
Technically, he was sent to his death. His brave soul did not have to be lost like that. I wonder what would have happened if he had specialized in any military discipline? I mourn his life, and I am trying to make sense of his sacrifice. At least I want to remember that I am on the battlefield and I need to have rigor in pressing myself to read and learn.
In this interview, General Mattis – a four-star US general – talked about weaponizing reading and education. Making good humor your armour. Strengthening body, soul, and spirit. We are on the battlefield, and we need to hold the line.
I loved how this guy has explained how did he coin new concepts by combining several of them. Also amazingly put together thoughts on transition to the meaning economy that is the direction the internet is going. So if you want to know what to expect of the online future and be relevant in it, I would advice you to watch
I have never dreamed of becoming a coach – I despised the idea of taking money to help out people, till one day I realized that:
The unpaid advice has no value in people’s eyes
Diary of The Coach – Kate Koronis
So sad that after asking for advice people rarely did what I advised them to do.
This was really frustrating.
It felt like a waste of time.
I felt devalued. It impacted my self-esteem.
It inspired my action.
I decided to not allow people to use my time without actually applying the advice.
Making them pay for advice felt like this would motivate them to act upon it.
I created my first coaching offer back in 2020 and got 10 clients who paid forward for coaching sessions within the first week. All the following month was booked!
I was inspired! But… I was inspired and excited all the month I was coaching. My students were excited too. That was exactly what they needed. However – No one actually did what I taught.
Waste of time, right? At least I was paid.
Still this outcome brought frustration and I stopped doing coaching for a wholeyear.
You see:
Coaching without having results to show – is unsustainable business
Diary of The Coach – Kate Koronis
If you can’t show the results of your coaching:
Who will be willing to investtime and money in your coaching sessions?
How will you have the courageto sell something that does not help?
Despite all my efforts, it did not work well. Imagine that:
some students were sleeping during the session and
one person just talked all 10 sessions about what he wanted to do.
I fell into a trap that, as I found out later, was caused by common misconceptions about the coaching business.
Let’s discuss what are the beliefs out there about coaching that is misleading or not quite true:
People believe that coaching is easy
People believe that coaching is easy. Because of this belief, I have not managed my energy properly.
I allowed to book as many as 5 one-hour back-to-back sessions a day 5 days a week. As a result, I:
Lost my voice after a month of constant talking
I found out in my 40s what a haemorrhoid means as a result of intensive sedentary work
And more (I can talk in more detail about my challenges of planning in another post)
So you can see that coaching is not easy.
For a successful coaching career, you need to have a good time management strategy and life–work balance
Diary of the Coach – Kate Koronis
As you may know by now, I was not able to continue at such a pace after 1,5 months. I had to change something.
Another common misconception is that it is just sharing your knowledge in a specific area.
Coaching is just sharing your knowledge
Sharing your knowledge is not what makes people have results. So if you package your knowledge nicely, create packages and sell it it does not mean people will be able to follow it.
I have purchased some courses myself without ever touching them.
The truth is that Life happens:
Circumstances,
Mental state (lack of motivation),
Lack of skills in time management and learning process…
And many other factors impact the ability of your clients to have results.
It is not only about sharing knowledge.
Coaching is creating the environment where the growth of your client is possible
Diary of The Coach – Kate Koronis
Another misconception is that you can start a coaching business because you have an idea
Anyone can start a coaching business
I do believe that anyone can coach. But it does not work like that: Veni-Vidi-Vici – You came, You saw, You won.
Coaching requires you to build systems for your clients.
The environment we spoke about above is about a proper system being in place that will allow your people to achieveresults.
I have seen many coachingbundles advertised in my Facebook feed that include Coaching tools. Those tools are the elements of the system. But the system is much more than tools.
Without the system, your coaching will be frustrating and very difficult. The system is what allows you to get predictable results. It has such elements as:
Support
Pacing
Environment
Reminding
Reporting and more
To conclude on the misconception: “Anyone can start a coaching business” – here is the takeaway
To start a coaching business become a person of Systems
Diary of The Coach – Kate Koronis
Let me summarize the main concepts I have learned and that I wish had known before starting the coaching business
Lessons Learned
Coaching has to end with clients’ results – otherwise, it won’t sell
Your coaching time has to be balanced – don’t kill yourself
Coaching is more than sharing knowledge – it is like being also a psychologist
Coaching is the ability to create and maintainsystems for your clients – you can’t do it with only your enthusiasm
I am happy I did not give up and I have managed to bounce back and build my coaching program which I run successfully for a year now.
